Why do I feel lonely all the time?

No matter our age, it’s natural to feel lonely at some points in our lives but feeling lonely for long periods of time can impact on our wellbeing and mental health. You may be searching for answers about the impact loneliness is having on your life and asking yourself ‘why do I feel lonely?’

Loneliness can be different for everyone. It can be a feeling of isolation, a lack of support, or regularly going without contact with others. Loneliness might make you feel stressed or anxious, and you may be looking for ways to minimise these feelings. Our Talking Therapies in Kent and Medway can help you reduce stress and anxiety with the right support from our expert therapists, including mindfulness exercises, creating a safety plan or just offering tips on advice on dealing with your mental health.

Loneliness is not always the same as being alone. You may have lots of people around you, be in a relationship, be part of a family or community, but still feel lonely – especially if you don’t feel understood or supported.

The UK is experiencing a loneliness epidemic, with almost half of adults reporting feeling lonely occasionally, sometimes, often or always in 2022 and young people at the very heart of it. Hundreds and thousands of elderly people are cut off from society in the UK, especially those aged over 75.

Everyone, regardless of their age, can experience feelings of loneliness and struggle with their mental health. But it is important to remember that there are ways to support friends or family members who might be struggling.

Loneliness in Young People

Young people may experience feelings of loneliness for several reasons, including school anxiety or problems at school, forming a connection with others and maintaining relationships, or some common mental health conditions, like anxiety or depression. The UK government’s tackling loneliness evidence review reported that loneliness is higher for people who are aged between 16 and 24 years old and are female. If you are living with a mental health condition, your risk of loneliness is higher, too.

If you are a young person located in Kent and Medway or the surrounding areas and are looking to talk about your thoughts and feelings with a therapist, we can support you through Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) or Interpersonal Therapy.

Loneliness in Adults

Many adults feel lonely for reasons similar to young and elderly people, like maintaining relationships and struggling to build new connections. However, a 2022 survey found that in a study of over 4,000 UK adults, 23% of them felt lonely, with those struggling financially more likely to say they felt lonely (32% compared to the wider 23% figure. There is a link between loneliness and money, with adults struggling financially feeling like they are unable to socialise because they cannot afford it.

A lack of socialisation can impact pre-existing mental health conditions, like anxiety, depression or stress, but talking to a specialised therapist can help. We offer Counselling for Depression, CBT and even Employment Support, if you are looking to get back out into the working world in Kent and Medway.

Loneliness in Older People

The elderly members of the UK’s population are especially vulnerable to feelings of loneliness. Age UK suggest that more than two million people in England who are aged over 75 live alone, and more than one million go a month without speaking to friends, family members or neighbours. In older people, getting weaker, leaving the workplace, the death of spouses and friends or disability or illness can impact getting out and being unable to leave the house can lead to depression or a serious decline in physical health or wellbeing.

Our Talking Therapies service can offer support to elderly people through Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and other areas of help, to limit loneliness and encourage them to socialise more.

Aside from Talking Therapies, there are several other methods of getting support and different ways to help combat loneliness, regardless of your age:

• Join a local community group or class doing something you enjoy
• Visit places where you can just be around people such as your local library, community centre, park or café

Talk about how you are feeling to a family member, friend or work colleagues Loneliness can affect everyone for many different reasons too. This could be down to big life changes such as bereavement, heartbreak, retirement, becoming a new parent, or might be triggered by certain times of the year, such as Christmas.

And when we’re feeling lonely, it can feel like we’re the only one. One in five people admit to feelings of loneliness and three in five people say they don’t feel confident talking about loneliness, so continue to suffer in silence.

If you’re feeling anxious, start to lose your appetite, have trouble sleeping, and feel consistently low, you may be dealing with chronic loneliness. It’s important to address loneliness in a healthy way and our team of therapists at NHS Talking Therapies Kent and Medway can help.

You can self-refer to our services, either through our Limbic referral assistant, a telephone referral by calling 0333 091 0414 or via your GP or other healthcare professional.

If you are experiencing loneliness, want to learn more about the causes of loneliness or understand how you are feeling, our team of expert therapists in Kent and Medway and the surrounding areas can offer help with loneliness or tips and advice to support your mental health. We are here to help you.